woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
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