nut hugger
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I'm bleeding and have questions
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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