5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Even the bartender felt bad for me
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
