IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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