well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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