i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
