how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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