this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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