He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
