you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
did i walk over a car last night?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
