I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
