i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
