There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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