I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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