please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
