so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
