i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize