chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
