You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
