im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
