how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize