quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Randomize
