she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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