butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
