I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
