imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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