This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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