she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
