i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
