I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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