can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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