So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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