Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
