Just mADE A PArabola og urine
where am i from again
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
it's like heaven, but drunker
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Randomize
