Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize