____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
