First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
