the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
