I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
