my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
