The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
