do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Randomize
