I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
