weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
