I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize