what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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