She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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