Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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