Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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