hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
