Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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