you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize